Saturday, 8 July 2017

Wattys 2017 Entries (Please Kill Me)

I have entered "Losing Sleep", "Inquisitor" and "Murder And Liquor" to the Wattys 2017. Surely one of them has got to win? Surely? Now, I was looking through the entries for this years Wattys and...I don't even know what to say anymore. All of it is absolute baloney. I am literally yawning as I go down the list. Just have a read of these "gems".

"Broken Hearts" (Uh, how original) 3.3 million reads. 121 thousand votes. "Hi, My Name Is Dan" (Hi Dan!) 851 thousand reads. 38.3 thousand votes. "7:23 AM" (No, really, that is the name of the book) 1.2 million reads. 94.5 thousand votes. "Our Story" (Blardy, blardy, f**kity, blah!) 3.3 million reads. 153 thousand votes. Should I go for one more? Yes, I think that I will. "The Hoodie Girl" (You already won last year, (How? I don't bloody know) why do you want to win again?) 41.2 million reads. 1.6 million votes. (No, really, those are the stats).

I want something original, not this type of baloney. I guarantee you that 90% of all of the entries are romance. Please...I want something original, not some cliched bull****. If I controlled the Wattys every year, no one would win, because of all of the bull****tery that I will have to waste my precious time over.

Okay, that's it, I'm done. See you in late September when the results are out. Probably the 25th or 26th, I don't know. But surely, I have got to win this year. If I don't, I will eat my hat.

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